Understanding How We Handle Feedback
In our previous session, we had an enjoyable discussion about how to represent factors that influence how we handle feedback.
The goal of feedback is to help someone improve. Ideally, feedback should increase our desire to implement a change and we should leave the conversation inspired. In order to feel inspired, we need to perceive the feedback situation as an opportunity for growth.
Let’s start by thinking about our individual baseline for how we perceive situations. This growth or optimism baseline is a measure of our general confidence about the successful outcome of any situation.
“Optimism: hopefulness and confidence about the future or the successful outcome of something.” Oxford Languages Online Dictionary
Where would you place your general baseline on a scale measuring optimism? In what situations does your baseline move up or down?
The impact of receiving negative feedback often causes us to move from our baseline. Ideally, all feedback would make us more hopeful about a successful outcome or more confident about the future. Recognizing how different types of feedback impact you is important for being able to ask for the type of feedback you need to thrive.
Imagine a situation where you received positive feedback. Did it increase your confidence about the future? Now imagine a situation where you received negative feedback. Did it also immediately increase your confidence about the future?
After the initial impact of the feedback, we begin a recovery process where we return to our general optimism or growth baseline. Recognizing why some feedback takes longer to recover from is another step toward being able to receive the type of feedback you need to thrive.
Reflect on the following:
What types of feedback are hard for you to hear? Do they relate to a previous experience, conversation, or goal?
Are some feedback triggers (challenges to what you perceive as the truth, your relationship with the feedback giver, or your idea of self - see the Things That Get in the Way of Understanding Feedback) more challenging for you than others?
Are there situations or times when it is harder to hear feedback?
When we recognize and articulate how we like to receive feedback, we can partner with those around us to maximize growth opportunities.
